30-minute meals

You know, I really really like the idea of cooking a meal in 30 minutes. The reality of that happening in this house is just a pipe dream. Let's observe the differences between Rachel Ray's kitchen and mine.

RR has an idea for dinner before she starts making it.

I have that nagging thought all day until 5:30 when I finally open the fridge and start cooking something...and often I'm STILL not even sure what it will be.

RR has all the ingredients on hand.

When I finally decide what I'm cooking, I usually have to change my idea in the middle of cooking the meal anyway because I don't have half of the ingredients. Otherwise I have to run to the store if I can't find a suitable substitute, or send my most charming daughter to the neighbor's house and beg for any missing ingredients.

RR has clean dishes.

I generally have to wash a load of dishes so I actually have counter space. Then I have to wash all my pots and pans so I actually have something to cook in.

RR magically seems to have all the spices she needs at the forefront of her cupboard.

I spend at least ten minutes digging through my awkward spice cupboard, lifting each bottle, reading the label, dropping it, knocking over eight bottles, half of them fall out onto the counter and one inevitably ends up in the butter dish. Clean off spice jar, replace and repeat.

RR doesn't have kids.

You can just add 15 minutes per kid onto any recipe prep. time. I always end up getting someone a drink, or running from the kitchen to see if there was any blood accompanying the scream, answering the phone, or shuffling slowly from the sink to the stove with a pot of water in my hands and a baby wrapped around my legs.

In the end, I consider getting ANY meal on the table a feat worth a cooking show of my own. The only problem with that is "30 Minute Meals" seems so much more catchy and optimistic than "90 minute meals with two time outs, fourteen homework questions and a minor concussion".