I grew up with Stacy Palmer. My first memory of her is standing in line at Black Hawk Roller Drome. For anyone born post 1985, that's where people roller skate, not roller blade, skate. It must have been a Halloween event because she was dressed as a strawberry and her mom was dressed as a watermelon. I remember Stacy kicking the stuffing in her mom's melon-y behind and laughing hysterically. From that moment on, I knew we would be friends. :)
Through elementary school we had sleepovers where we didn't actually sleep and then we would eat our body weight in Cookie Crisp cereal the next morning. (What a treat! Without Stacy, I never would have known that cereal existed!) I had a secret crush on her older brother Chad and of course we had ridiculous pet names for each other. She was "Tasty" and I was "Tar". I don't remember how that came about but we still use them!
Our senior year of high school we had an art class together. (Stacy is an amazing artist for anyone who doesn't know.) One day she asked me to tell her about my church. So I did, she took lessons from the missionaries and decided to join The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I had moved to New Jersey the summer after our senior year and so I missed her baptism, but I wrote a talk and sent it home (back in the days before e-mail) for my mom to read at the service.
The next year we decided to go to Ricks College together out in Rexburg, Idaho. We packed up a ridiculous amount of crap and bought tickets on the Greyhound Bus. What a trip that was!!! It started with us not knowing that we had to pay extra for our five million pieces of luggage, thus using up all of the cash we brought for food. We met some very interesting characters, nearly got left at a rest stop in Cheyenne, Wyoming but eventually made it to Idaho. We made an illustrated record of our trip that I am suddenly very anxious to find....It's hilarious!
It was the perfect beginning to my favorite year of college. We were insane! Stacy and I scored these amazing robes at the thrift store that we wore everywhere. I'm in the red and Stacy is in the yellow one. This picture was taken during the Homecoming parade that we joined...uninvited. We just figured people with robes like ours shouldn't keep something so fabulous to themselves.
Then of course there were the rambunctious trips to Wal-Mart where we acted 1/3 our age in the toy section. (Don't worry, this picture is just an illusion)
See that purse I'm holding? Someone at Wal-Mart was sitting out front with a box of free kittens. I just thought they were the cutest things I had ever seen, so I took one. I fully intended to give it back after our shopping trip, knowing that we weren't allowed to have pets in our house, but when we got outside again the girl was gone...so I ended up taking a kitten home. There just happened to be a random box of cat food sitting on the fridge. No one seemed to know where it came from or how long it had been there, but we fed it to the cat anyway. It seemed to have a loosening effect on the cat's bowels which only sped up my search for a new home for the dear little thing. Then I was nuzzling his cute little face and he bit me on the lip. We gave him to my roommates little sister.
Stacy had Oliver and brought him to my baby shower when I was pregnant with my oldest daughter Leah. We laughed about maternity pants and stretch marks. Over the next decade we saw each other when I came to Iowa to visit and kept in touch through emails and Face book.
Then one day I read Stacy's blog. Oliver had a brain tumor. How is this possible? What if it was my little Leah who was just a few months younger than him? I was overwhelmed with the realization that it really could happen to anyone. I cried for her, I prayed for her. Over the past two years I have watched my amazing friend create a million memories for her family.
They threw a "Bald is Beautiful" party and everybody shaved their heads so Oliver didn't have to be bald alone when he started his radiation treatment. Even Stacy's mom joined it!
They went to dance marathons,
they went to games
they went to Disneyland
Through all of this, Oliver's amazing spirit started to really shine! Everyone who met him immediately fell in love with his quick wit, humor and heart melting smile.
(Honorary Waterloo Police Officer)
Instead of feeling sorry for himself, Oliver reached out to others. He requested donations of blankets so he could deliver them to other children in hospitals. Over 5,000 blankets were given out because of him. http://wcfcourier.com/news/local/waterloo-boy-oliver-palmer-loses-battle-with-cancer/article_8ed3027a-58d6-11e1-a5cc-0019bb2963f4.html
Oliver played the piano for anyone who would listen, including Brandon Flowers,the lead singer of The Killers, his favorite band who heard of Oliver and made a special trip to give him a private concert in his living room.
This past summer when we were in Iowa visiting, Ollie blessed me a with little concert of my own. Then I sat next to him and taught him a song. He entertained us all with a hilarious story (including actions) about almost falling out of the moving car. We laughed until we cried.
(all our kids together)
Tasty and Tar still laughing to hard we look weird :)
Then Oliver's body started to give up. I think his spirit was just too big to stay here anymore. And do you want to know what else I think? I think that before we came down to earth, we were all up in heaven chillin' on our cloud hammocks and God came up to us and said, "I have a very special plan. Each of you needs to play an important part. Some of you need to learn specific life lessons that will only happen through the sacrifice and example of someone very special. It's not going to be easy, it will probably be painful, but in the whole grand scheme of things it will only be a short moment."
I think Ollie jumped out of his hammock with arms waving and said, "Pick me! Pick me!" Then I think Stacy and Ed (who were spooning in the next hammock over) jumped up and begged, "Please let us be the parents of this giving spirit. We can teach him what he needs to know in his short life on earth and we are willing to learn from his amazing example. Sponge Bob." (Just had to throw that in there.) The rest of us who were still sipping lemonade in our hammocks near by gave God the thumbs up and promised to watch Ollie, learn from him and support Ed and Stacy when the time came.
And just as sure as I am about what happened before we came to earth, I am equally as confident that when it's our turn to leave this earth, Ollie is going to be lounging in his hammock, practicing his harp (maybe they have keyboards up there?) and when he sees us, he'll smile that heart warming smile and ask, "What took ya so long?"
I love you Oliver and the whole Palmer family. Because I know you, I try each day to be a better mother to my children. I try to love others more freely. I try to give of my time and look for opportunities to serve. Because I know you my life has been so richly blessed.
May God bless you with peace throughout the rest of your blessed life on earth.
2 comments:
Shar you are so wise in so many ways. Ollie was a big brave soul as are everyone lucky enough to be part of his life.
And I'm still crying after reading this, because I'm sad for Ollie's family and friends and because your words are so touching and powerful.
Though I'm also laughing with joy at how incredibly fun life is. It's a very weird mix this morning!
Love the robes by the way. Why didn't I think of something so incredibly cool?
Though I never knew Ollie myself, I'll never forget him.
Laura
What a darling little boy! I wish I had known him. You were a good friend to their family, Sharly. Thanks for sharing their story. I have a hard time grasping why little ones go back home so dang early. I hope their family is doing okay, as well as can be expected during this time. Prayers and thoughts to those good people!
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